hooooollllllywooood

Hugh Hefner donated 900,000 bucks to save the Hollywood sign this week. I have a feeling people are gonna argue that he should have given his money to a worthier urgent cause but I gotta say I find it really cool. Cole and I went out to LA for the first time a little over two years ago. The whole place was so fucking weird and wacky. I guess sorta like coming to New York if you’ve never been before. Except completely different in every way possible.

Every block reminded me of a movie or a movie star or a TV show or of the mere existence of Courtney Cox in general (that is… if she really DOES exist at all) (PS- she does. Its proven every week on ABC’s ‘Cougar Town’) (No really. That wasn’t a joke about Courtney Cox being a virtual hologram of her former self nowadays but a plug that you can watch Courtney Cox every week on whats surprisingly a pretty popular sitcom) (BTW- I have no problems with Courtney Cox or any of the ‘Friends’ cast for that matter…. in fact, I’m a fan) (Finally, do you have Google Alerts, Courtney Cox? If so- HEY!)

I found LA to be just as neat as it is weird. I was overwhelmed by the driving aspect. We drove a Smart Car around town one day and I literally cried for a good seventy five percent of that time. Not because of all those weird reminders of Courtney Cox’s existence but because I was so fucking nervous about driving in Los Angeles. In that cartoon tiny car. It was pretty frightening.

Every meeting we went to took place in an office covered in posters for movies and sitcoms that had literally been my religion growing up. We went to a party and ate cheese off the same plate as Dana Delaney. This town is NO fucking joke, y’all.

At various times, or rather a good percentage of the time, I was pretty intensely freaked out by the place. It was SO unlike home. SO unlike anywhere I’d ever been and overall just really weird. We happened to be staying at an apartment in West Hollywood and from the balcony we had an insane view of the Hollywood Hills along with it, the Hollywood Sign. It was magical, dizzying, and beckoning high atop the hill…. just below the observatory where they filmed ‘Rebel Without A Cause’ and every night Cole and I would stay up super late, sit on the balcony, drink wine, and stare up at the huge white sign.

There was one especially intense moment for me…. when I found myself looking at the whole situation; at Cole, at me, at the street below, at the Norma Desmond-esque houses lining the Hollywood Hills, and at that giant glowing sign framing it all. It was hard for me to wrap my mind around being there…. it was somehow different than my ongoing New York ‘Holy Shit’ moments…. there was something exotic and dreamlike about that place….. about that sign…. about the whole thing. You could smell TV and movies being made right across the street and that does something to a kid who grew up on Roseanne Barr and Lucille Ball.

I’m really glad somebody didn’t tear down the Hollywood sign and build condos…. cause I think it’d sorta screw with that kinda magic there. And I happen to think magic is kinda cool. Oh. And so are you, Courtney Cox.

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2 Comments on “hooooollllllywooood”

  1. Brandon Says:

    Gotta respect a man who has the balls to use ten parentheses in one paragraph about Courtney Cox…


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